4 soft skills you should have mastered by age 30

4 soft skills you should have mastered by age 304 soft skills you should have mastered by age 30By the time youre blowing out the candles on yur 30th birthday cake, fruchtwein professionals have been working for a solid eight years. Throw in internships from college (remember those days?) - and you might have upwards of a decade of experience as you reach the end of the first third of your life. Gulp.While youve likely been working tirelessly to learn an invaluable hard skill - coding computers, writing, strategy, analytics and so on - how do you measure up on the other half of your job performance?Soft skills are not as discussed as technical proficiencies, but as career expert and entrepreneur Christopher Kingman explains, soft skills are related to the interaction between two or more people and speak volumes about your ability to be a leader.Here, the indisputable soft skills you should have mastered by the time you reach the big 3-0Active listeningWe all have someone in our li ves - whether a treasured best friend or a parent or sibling - who just seems to get you. No matter what earth-shattering or minuscule issue youre going through, what you need advice about or achievement you need to celebrate, he or she is fully present with an open heart - and ears. Kingman says these types of people have mastered the art of active listening.While it might seem like anyone can do this, if they, ya know, listen - the keyword here is active. He explains this method refers not merely waiting for your turn to throw in two cents in but listening with a purpose.This is listening with the intention of seeking to understand what the person is telling you with and without words, he continues.To test if youve nailed this, Kingman says to pay attention the next time someone discusses something of importance with you. Instead of considering your response, stay right in the moment.Pay attention to the words, timing, cadence, pauses and emotion in how they speak. Once they a re done, validate what they said, and repeat back their version of what they told you, he suggests. If you really did hone in on words, timing, cadence, pauses and emotion, youll be able to recount their story, and its impact clearly. Active listening is about ingesting and processing what people are saying, and demonstrating that their message resonates with you.Servant leadershipEveryone has a different leadership style but others are more successful and accepted than others. For career expert Joy Altimare, managers are most effective when they direct with a mind towards servitude. As defined, its a concept that suggests that true leaders understand the importance of the following characteristics as it relates to building and managing a loyal, high-performing team listening, empathy, awareness, persuasion, conceptualization, foresight, stewardship, commitment to the growth of people, and building community.Altimare says this style composed of many soft skills is a refreshing, desi rable quality. It is important for leaders to go beyond their corporate values, and become invested in encouraging an environment that supports performance, collaboration, and camaraderie, she adds.Effective communicationThis seems like a no-brainer, but its surprising how poorly some people can communicate. Now, Im not talking about varying degrees of vocabulary despite what grade school made you believe, most people dont speak or write with complicated words. Im talking about peoples ability to convey a message, or to get to the point. The challenge with communication is that just like anything else its a skill, one that gets stronger as you develop it. Kingsman explains that one of the false assumptions is that it is inherently a skill everyone has, but, expert communicators are those who get their message to listeners so they understand it.They do it directly, succinctly and with little meandering or wavering. Simply put, they get the point across, he adds.To improve your commu nication skills, Kingsman has one very important tip thats easier than you think pause. Much like your parents recommended you think before you speak when you were growing up, the same advice applies throughout your professional career, too. Kingsman suggests simply counting to three.Youd be surprised how many thoughts pass through our brains in three seconds, let alone the ways to say what you need to say, he continues. When you leverage that pause, think to yourself, what am I saying? and Will it be understood? Being conscious of what you say and how you say it is the mark of a good communicator.Emotional intelligenceOf all the skills to master before you enter your thirties, emotional intelligence is the most difficult and demanding, according to Kingsman. While it encompasses many aspects, Kingsman says, generally speaking, this is your ability to recognize and be aware of your emotions, others emotions, and practicing empathy for them. Sometimes this is an easy task crying indi cates sadness, while smiling usually means happiness. But when you really develop your EQ, as Kingsman puts it, you have the foresight to dig deeper.Besides seeing and recognizing emotions, this skill helps us navigate social situations, make complex choices, and is arguably one of the key factors in our success, he explains. We need smart people to do things like run electrical grids and design clean energy, we also need people to interact in meaningful ways. Having emotional intelligence, both being aware of your own emotions and others, helps bridge the gap between people and situations.When youre able to pick up on the obvious and dubious signals people send, youre more likely to gain their trust, foster stronger connections and overall, be perceived as a thoughtful, sincere human.